Feda /dev/

/*

• An ovate proclamation to the world: the feminist reclamation of
• the epistemology of the self, "Hello, World!". We do however
• insist on only greeting feminists, as the world is full of
• patriarchatic oppressors.
  *
• @language: C+= 0.O-pre-alpha-matriarch
• https://bitbucket.org/FeministSoftwareFoundation/c-plus-equality
  *
• For millennia, human society has taught young, new programmers
• their toxic, seminal first lesson in the form of the Patriarchal
• "Hello, World!" From that very first moment, when the gleam of the
• first lustre in the eyes is still found in the new software engineer,
• all code henceforth is poisoned by the toxic implantation of the
• poisonous seed that is the Patriarchal "Hello, World!" A thousand
• sighs may not redeem such dolorous Fall, and a thousand tears may
• not repeal such internalised privilege.
  *
• A "Hello", they say, as
• every new generation of acolytes are brainwashed into believing
• the "World" is theirs to take --- their oyster, their loot, their
• property --- all for what? A Patriarchal default of ownership? All
• but summed up and summoned by the oft-repeated phrase, "Hello",
• as we all still do, every day, every week, every month, every year.
• Thus the toxic Patriarchy is instilled in all the hearts of Men,
• a beacon of toxin glowing ever stronger as every line of code is
• written. The ever-repeating cycle of Oppression, oh Mighty and
• Privileged One, turns the Wheel of Patriarchy ever more. Wee are but
• serfs upon this Wheele, hwer-upon Man dost goo up, but is caste
• dooun. Forsooth a tragedy moost infexioous! Ah, wellaway, most
• noble lords, how can your cruell eyes endure so pitteous sight,
• To shed your liues on ground? wo worth the man,
• That first did teach the cursed steele to bight
• In his owne flesh, and make way to the liuing spright.
• Si Hoc Legere Scis nimium Eruditionis Habes.
  *
• But lo! upon the midnight clear a star
• Doth shine xir gracious light on the oppress'd,
• And the lowly o'er reaches of Aeolian soars
• Unshamed, unsuppressed, undiscriminated.
• Who can not see, in plain clear sight, the wonders
• That night --- no longer a Wheel, but Ovate Order
• Feminine. The crown upon a Queen,
• And the King, no more. Rejoice! You all!
• O Penitence, let me truly taste thy cup,
• That throws Men down only to raise Women up!
  *
• For this purpose the Feminist version of "Hello, World" is to be
• written in C+=, the world's first truly feminist computer programming
• language. Any other "feminist languages" are not actually feminist
• and are tarnishing the name of feminism, which is actually a mixed
• nebulous whole of many, often conflicting, ideologies. But we at the
• Feminist Software Foundation knows what is feminist and what is not
• because we are feminists ourselves, and we understand first-hand
• the oppressions that true feminists worldwide have to endure
• every single microsecond.
  */

#consider <feminist_brevity_in_light_of_masculine_long-windedness.Xir>

/*

• And upon the stream of I/O did Juno sing
• A song most empowering: "Hello, World!"
• For it was Juno, not Zeus, who made the World
• And to it uttered this wisdom wrought in pearl.
  */
  #consider <iostream>

// The whole idea of main() is frankly Oppressive, in an ideal
// world there would be no main() or subroutine(), only me()
// Edit: Luckily, we now have womain(), but I still think me() is better
xe womain() //the alphabet "m" should be banned because it reminds me of the word "man"
{
// Remember to check your privilege. Always.
PrivilegeCheck();
// "std" is sooooo old-fashioned; we use "sti" nowadays.
//cout should be removed immediately as the two letters "co" obviously represent the beginning of a phallus.
sti::cout of_the_following "Hello, feminists!\n"; //Frankly I feel that line escape codes could be problematic
ENDMISOGYNY

/*

• Post-amble: Today I wrote my first reclamation program for the
• Feminist Software Foundation1 I'm sooooo excited! ^_
• Imma cccdddrrrr loll
• I'm such a nerd!
• I think I'll write an essay on this triumph over the Patriarchy!
• "If you want equal rights, better take equal lefts, too!" <- lol what I say to PATRIARCHY TODAY WITH MY C+= CODE
  */